Q. How do we let guests know where we are registered or let them know that we would prefer cash gifts?
A. Traditionally, it is improper to include registry information or registry inserts in a wedding invitation. It implies that you expect a gift. It is also not in good taste to include “no gifts please”, or “please make donations to…”, or “cash gifts only”. A good resource for guests are your family and your wedding party. They will be able to verbally spread the word of your wishes, but only when asked. Some guests will still want to show their joy for your through gifts, whether on or off of your registry. A hand written note from you or your spouse is customary to send as appreciation of their gift. What if you are registering for a honeymoon? The etiquette remains the same: include the information on your wedding website, include that website on your enclosures and allow your bridal party to spread the word.
Many couples are creating personal wedding websites with all their details included on one page. Many of these websites include a page dedicated to registry information. Include your wedding website on enclosures and save the dates to ensure guests are properly informed. But, no matter what do not include it on your formal invitation.
What about gifts for showers and engagement parties?
A. Gifts are typically not a part of engagement parties. An engagement party is a way to mingle with friends and new family members in celebration of your engagement, and are held early in the engagement. No worries…wedding soiree’s will come! Engagement parties are a great way for your wedding party to spread the verbal word of your registry, but only when asked.
Many wedding shower hosts are sending invitations with registry information. Guests actually prefer the ease of knowing where they can find gifts for the couple.